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Some people think that the iPhone 5S is the best iPhone that Apple – or for that matter, anybody – has actually ever made.
They could well be right, but that doesn’t mean it’s best, and it certainly doesn’t imply that Apple’s most recent i-device is flaw-free or past criticism.
There are lots of needs to like the iPhone 5S – here are seven reasons – but you won’t find them right here: today we are the haters, and haters gonna hate.
1. It’s even more expensive
The iPhone has never ever been the most economical smartphone, and the iPhone 5S is the most expensive yet: it starts at a whopping ₤ 549 for the 16GB version, which is ₤ 20 more than the outbound (and outdated) iPhone 5.
And that’s for simply 16GB of storage, which is not truly enough any more. The sensible option, the 32GB model, is ₤ 629 in the UK. It will be a bit less costly on agreement, of course, but it’s still rather large.
2. It’s destroyed the trade-in value of your iPhone 5
Here’s how the smartphone Circle of Life is supposed to work. Apple reveals a brand-new thing, you trade in in 2012’s brand-new thing, you put the money to the brand-new thing. Easy.
Here’s how it worked this year. Apple unveiled the iPhone 5S and stopped the iPhone 5, triggering recycling sites to rush to their computers and brutally lower their iPhone 5 trade-in rates so badly that a mint iPhone 5 will soon be worth less than a packet of mints.
And as we have already mentioned, the iPhone 5S got a sly cost hike too, which simply rubs salt in the wound.
3. It ought to be scratch-proof, however it’s n’t
Apple can call the dark colored one Space Grey all it suches as, but its real name ought to be Scratchy McRubbish: that anodised aluminium case is so prone to scratching that you can scuff it by playing an episode of Itchy and Scratchy in iTunes.
The white one’s a bit better, however just because white is closer to the color of bare aluminium and as an outcome, the scratches are not as apparent. The gold one should be fairly scratch-resistant too, due to the fact that gold is comparatively easy to anodise. Hang on – did someone discuss the gold one?
4. Apple’s gone bling
iPhone. iPhone 3G. iPhone 3GS. iPhone 4. iPhone 4S. iPhone 5. What do they all have in common? That’s right. NONE OF THEM ARE GOLD.
There’s a reason for that, which reason is basic: gold things are for magpies, old individuals and pinheads. Don’t think us? Sit back and think of the kind of individuals who’d simply enjoy a gold iPhone. Are you thinking Robin Thicke? Russian gangsters? The cast of The Only Method Is Essex? Obviously you are.
5. There’s a bigger, much better one due next year
The networks would truly like you to take your iPhone 5S on a two-year agreement, however we all know Apple’s modus operandi now: the big hitters come out every two years with a brand-new design and bunches of brand-new goodies, and the S models are relatively minor upgrades launched in the years between.
This is an in-between year, an ‘S’ year, and we know exactly what that indicates: a larger, better iPhone 6 this time next year that’ll make you rue the day you put a cross in the box of that two-year agreement. Just imagine exactly what it might do.
If an S-model iPhone can read your fingers, maybe the 6 will be able to review your mind, or make your animals levitate. To be truthful, we ‘d be quite thrilled if it simply had much better battery life and a slightly bigger screen.
6. The unreasonable fear that someone’s going to steal your fingers, or possibly photocopy them
Now that Apple’s welcomed fingerprints to open your iPhone and authorise iTunes investments with Touch ID, attempt not to envision somebody taking your phone and then coming back for your fingers so that they can unlock it.
That’s bizarre to state the least, obviously, and we ‘d simply dismissed the whole overly suspicious possibility when Newsweek writer Peter Jukes pointed out on Twitter that criminals would be able to 3D-print replacement fingers. Simply because it’s unlikely does not indicate that you shouldn’t fear the Fingerprint Crooks.
7. You’ll have to wait for it
If you’ve actually currently decided you desire an iPhone 5S, absolutely nothing below will alter your mind – but that does not suggest you can simply purchase your iPhone 5S today and embark on a new life of gadget-fuelled cosiness.
Nope: you’ll have to wait until 20 September, or longer still if you don’t stay in among the nine launch countries (the US, Australia, Canada, China, France, Germany, Japan, Singapore and the UK).